Chickpea Salad:

This Is A Mock-Free Zone

My wife was looking for a new recipe to try a few weeks back. She told me she missed tuna salad sandwiches so she did a search for "vegetarian tuna salad". After a little looking around online, she came up with a few recipes for "mock" tuna salad using chickpeas. Most of the recipes she found are very similar to tuna salad recipes. So, at first, we just made them the way we did in the past. Only now, we used chickpeas instead of tuna. It wasn't quite right at first and need just a little tweaking to get the flavor profile and the texture right but eventually we nailed it.   

I'll admit, I was pretty skeptical about this one at first but the more I imagined it my mind, the more it seemed to make sense. So I figured I'd give it a shot. She made me a sandwich and I'll be darned if it wasn't pretty tasty. It's easy to make, it goes together quickly, and it's somewhat versatile. You can eat it all on it's own. Or maybe on a bed of crisp lettuce and topped with some diced tomatoes. You can put a spoonful on a cracker or on a crostini. You can fill a pita pocket with it along with some sprouts, a few tomato slices and few cucumber slices or you can put it between two slices of bread. You could even make a "melt" with it. More about that later.

Although this recipe was found originally by searching for "vegetarian tuna sandwich". It's really not that at all. It's a proper chickpea salad. And it should be regarded as such. So no "mock" salad here. This is chickpea territory. 

Tip: To make the melt, heat a skillet over a medium heat. Butter two slices of bread on one side only. Place a slice of cheese (I recommend provolone) on one side of the bread making sure the butter side is down so it's the side touching the skillet when you cook it. Then spread a layer of the chickpea salad on top on the cheese. If you like a lot of cheese, put another layer of cheese over the chickpea layer then top with the other slice of buttered bread, again butter side out. Place in the skillet and let it cook until the bottom slice is golden and the cheese begins to melt, about 3 minutes. Then flip the sandwich over and allow the other side to get golden and to allow the cheese to fully melt. 

Chickpea Salad

Ingredients: 

• 1 15 oz can of chickpeas, drained
• 3 Tbsp celery, chopped fine
• 2 scallions, chopped fine
• 2 tsp capers minced + 1 tsp of the caper brine
• 2 tsp Dijon mustard
• 2 tsp vegetarian Worcestershire sauce (in a pinch, use soy sauce - but use the Worcestershire if possible)
• black pepper, to taste
• 1/4 to 1/2 cup mayonnaise, depending on your preference

For Sandwiches:

• 6 slice bread
• leaves of crispy lettuce (I prefer romaine or iceberg lettuce)
• tomato slices

Preparation:

1. Place the chickpeas into a food processor. Using the metal blade, pulse until the chickpeas are finely chopped but not pureed. It's up to you how chunky you want your salad. I like the chickpeas to be similar in size to rice.   
  

2. Remove the chopped chickpeas to a medium bowl. Add the remaining ingredients and mix with a spoon until fully incorporated. 

3. You take this recipe from here. Make sandwiches, make a melt, do with it what you will.  

Serves: 3 (if making sandwiches)

  

Falafel

I Feel Awful! (no I don't)

Every time I hear the word falafel, that's the first thing that pops into my mind..Feel Awful. A few days ago, I was testing out possible blog post names and decided to run it past my wife. She rolled her eyes at me and said it was predictable and way too easy. Fast forward to today and I asked her if she wanted some falafel. She said no because if she ate falafel, she'd feel awful. Then she proceeded to giggle. When I didn't laugh, she asked why? I said because you told me it was predictable when I made it up previously so why should I laugh? She then tried to tell me that SHE made it up. Then denied we ever had that conversation and claimed that she would never have told me it was predictable. My wife is coo coo.  

If you've never had falafel, you are in for a treat. They pack a %&@-load (or butt-load, if you prefer) of flavor into a little fritter that you and can pack into a pita pocket or eat alone as an appetizer. It's an Arab food traditionally served with a tahini sauce, a sesame seed based condiment. However, I have found that I am not a fan of traditional tahini sauce. I tried. It just didn't work for me. 

So I found a few alternative sauces that kick booty with this dish. The first is a "tahini based" sauce that includes cilantro and parley. Found this one on an Indian food site that, by the way, rocks. I've tried several of her recipes and totally dig them. If fact, the falafel recipe was adapted from this site as well. 

The second sauce is a tzatziki sauce. This is a Greek yogurt-based sauce that is traditionally served as topping or condiment for gyros. OOOHH....It just hit me. This is fusion. You got Greek/Arab fusion and Indian/Arab fusion depending on which sauce you choose. Either way, you have perfection. 

So..this recipe includes the falafel along with both sauce recipes. I put the feel-awful in front of my wife along with both sauces asked her which one she liked best. She couldn't pick. She loved them both but basically said it's apples and oranges. Both are so different and both are so good. 

Sorry to do you this way but I guess you'll have to try them both. It's okay....your not gonna lose either way. 

Ingredients: 

Falafel

• 1 cup dried chickpeas (garbanzo beans)
• 2 tablespoon chopped flat leaf parsley
• 2 tablespoon chopped cilantro
• 1 green chili (jalapeno, serrano, etc)
• About 1/4 inch piece of ginger
• 1 1/2 teaspoon salt adjust to taste
• 1 teaspoon cumin seeds
• 1 teaspoon red chili flakes (crushed red peppers)
• 1/4 cup all purpose flour
• 2 Tbsp water
• Also need oil to fry

Preparation:

1. Place the dried chickpeas in a bowl and cover them with water. The water should be an inch or so over  the chickpeas. Let them sit over night preferably for about 24 hours. They should double in size.  

2. In a sauce pan, boil the chickpeas over a medium to medium-high heat in about 4 cups of water for 20 minutes until they are tender but not soft. You don't want the chickpeas to be over cook and soak in too much water. If you do, they will basically disintegrate in the oil when you try to cook them. So no more than 20 minutes. Once done, drain the water and let the chickpeas cool. 

3. In a food processor, combine chickpeas and the remaining ingredients except for the oil. Pulse until coarsely blended. The mixture should not be pasty and should have a grainy texture. See photo below. The mixture might be slightly dry. If so, add 1-2 Tbsp of water and pulse it again to incorporate the water. You should be able to form patties easily. 

4. Form falafel into approximately 20 small patties, 1 1/2 inches across and maybe 3/4 inches thick.   

5. Heat oil in a frying pan or pot on medium high heat. The frying pan should have about 1 1/2 inches of oil. You can check the oil to see if it ready by putting a small piece of the falafel dough into it and if it bubbles immediately, the oil is ready. Don't heat the oil on high because you don't want it too hot. If it's too hot, the falafel will cook too quickly on the outside and not cook enough in the middle. If your tester dough turns brown quickly, your oil is to hot. 

6. Slowly drop the falafel patties in the oil and fry until they are brown in color both sides. You should try not to cook too many at once. I usually do the full recipe in about 3-4 batches batches  It should take about 4-5 minutes to cook each batch but use your judgement. The should be a darker but still golden brown. 

7. Set patties on a paper towels to absorb excess oil. 

8. Serve the falafel as a stand alone appetizer with the dipping sauces or, put them into pita pockets with shredded lettuce, chops tomatoes and cucumber and top them with the sauce. 

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Tahini Sauce

• 1/4 cup sesame seeds
• 1 1/4 teaspoon salt adjust to taste
• 2 tablespoons lemon juice
• 2 tablespoons olive oil
• 1/2 teaspoon cumin seeds
• About 2 tablespoon chopped parsley
• About 2 tablespoon chopped cilantro
• 1 green chili adjust to taste
• A few Tbsps of water as needed

Preparation:

1. Using a frying pan, dry toast the sesame seeds on medium heat for 2 - 3 minutes. They may change color a bit but only very slightly.

2. Add sesame seeds along with the remaining ingredients to a blender and puree to a smooth pourable sauce. If too think, add a tablespoon of water until sauce is thick but pourable. Then refrigerate until your ready to use it.  

  

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Tzatziki Sauce

• 1 1/2 cups plain lowfat Greek yogurt
• 1 lb cucumbers, peeled and seeded
• 3 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
• 1 tsp dried dill
• 2 cloves garlic, minced
• 1 Tbsp fresh lemon juice
• 3/4 tsp salt

Preparation:

1. The first thing you need to determine is if your yogurt needs to be strained. I have seen several recipes that call for this procedure before putting the sauce together but I have found that, with the yogurt I buy, this step is not necessary. If the yogurt holds a shape when spooned, you probably won't need to do this. But if it doesn't, you can put the yogurt into cheesecloth lined strainer over a bowl and let it strain in the fridge for 3-4 hours. If you're not using Greek yogurt, you will definitely have to strain it, possibly over night. That being said, it's strongly recommended that you use the Greek yogurt. It'll just make a superior sauce. 

2. Next, peel your cucumber, cut it in half lengthwise and, using a spoon, scoop out the seeds. You can chop the cucumbers in a food processor by pulsing them. You do not want to puree them. Just pulse to a small dice. This allows for a little texture to the sauce.

3. Put you cucumbers in a few layers of cheesecloth and squeeze the excess water out. This is important because your sauce might be too watery if it's not done. 

4. Finally, add all the ingredients back into the food processor and pulse to combine. If you're not using a food processor, of course you can just mix it together by hand with a large spoon.     

Guacamole

Guacamole:

The Rustic Delight

One of my favorite things on this Earth is guacamole. I'm quite certain I could eat it every day and never get tired of it. It's such a simple and easy thing to make. Not too easy to mess up but stranger things have happened. I've have some pretty funky guac in my day.

I'm always dumbfounded when I hear people say they hate it. Or that it tastes gross. I don't know why that shocks me but it does every time. I always think there's something wrong with that person. I wouldn't think that if they said soup or cereal or lasagne. But guacamole? Come on man! I know, it's kinda weird, but I yam what I yam. A ga ga ga. (sorry for the lame Popeye reference). On my way home the other day, I was listening to the radio and there are these two deejay's in the afternoon that were going on about how they hate it. Both of them. That's downright un-American, if you ask me. I actually switched over to the pop station. And if you know me at all, that's a pretty powerful statement. 

In days of old, I was the type of guy who'd buy of those guacamole flavor packets they usually sell right next to the avocados in the supermarket. And they served their purpose for the times I used them. But I've always had a much greater sense of accomplishment when I was able to create something on my own, without the assistance of a flavor packet full of a mysterious powdery substance. Yeah, it takes longer, there's more effort, it requires thought, etc. But in the end, it's so much better. 

Before writing this post, I scooted about the internet to see if I could find any interesting tidbits regarding this amazing treat. But alas, I wasn't able to dig up anything too remarkable. From what I was able to gather, and I'll make this quick, it was invented by the Aztecs and dates back over 500 years. Several sites mention that the Spaniards first came across it when they paid their little visit to the Aztecs. Curiously enough, that too was about 500 years ago. Who knows how long the Aztecs were making it before then. Oh yeah, and the word guacamole is derived from two Aztec words meaning "mashed testicles". Mmm mmm good!  

For the record, I like my guac a little more rustic. I like it chunky and I like the occasional crunch of a green onion or a little piece of jalapeno (which I totally forgot to put on the plate in the photo above, duh). I've had the guacamole that is mashed completely smooth and it's ok but I think a superior guac has texture. It's mashed but only about halfway. And then there's the question of lemon vs. lime. Me? I prefer the lime. I like the flavor a bit more and it gives me an excuse to make margaritas with the leftovers. Of course, the 28 limes I bought may have been a bit of overkill but hey, my blender sports 3 horsepower. Grunt grunt (sorry for that lame Tim Allen reference).

Now, before you make this guacamole, throw out all your other guac recipes because this will be your new "go to" recipe. Trust me. 

Ingredients: 

6 medium avocados (5 if they are larger) 
juice from 1 half a lime
1 tsp of salt (I use a seasoning salt called Johnny's. Better flavor than salt and less sodium) 
1/2 tsp black pepper
1 tsp of hot pepper sauce (Tabasco, Tapatia, etc.)
1/2 cup of cilantro leaves, chopped (from about 10 sprigs)
2 Roma tomatoes, seeded and chopped
2-3 green onions, chopped
1-2 jalapenos, chopped
3 garlic cloves, minced

To make the guacamole: 

In a bowl, add chopped avocados, lime juice, salt, pepper, and hot pepper sauce. Using a potato masher, mash the contents into a rough mash. Leaving the mixture half mashed and half chunky. 

Add the remaining ingredients and fold them in using a spoon, being careful not the mash the avocado any further. 

Serve with chips you stole from the Mexican restaurant.